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13 Bizarre Kids' Products You Won't Believe Exist

May 14 2016 - 10:02am

Ever found yourself staring at a parenting product wondering, "What on earth were they thinking?!" We asked moms to tell us about the most bizarre parenting products [1] available, from a ride-on potty trainer to a placenta teddy bear. Get ready for your jaw to drop!

Potty Ride-On Toy

"There's also the potty chair on wheels [2] that is fashioned like a ride-on toy. A toddler rolling a portable toilet around seems like a recipe for disaster if you ask me!" — Susan M. [3]of Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva [4]

 

Baby Bangs

"'Baby bangs [5]: created for baby girls who have little or no hair, to enhance their natural beauty.' Really, people? Lulu’s almost 2 and only has about 17 hairs on her head, but I’m still not gonna make the poor kid wear a wig. Plus, what would that do to her self-esteem? It's just nuts. Now if she’s 3 and still bald, well . . . then it’s wig time." — Janet D. [6] of Tulip and Thelma [7]

The Baby Snuggie

"The Baby Snuggie is up there [8], for sure. I'm pretty sure that's what you wear to the park if you want the other moms and kids to stay far, far away from you (which could come in handy if you want to snag a swing on a busy day)." — Candy K. [9]of The Laughing Stork [10]

Poop Plush Toy

"There’s the poop plush toy. Ummm, that’s exactly what I wanna teach my kid [11]: to play with sh*t. It’s bad enough that Lu wants to crap on the floor instead of the potty, but the last thing I need is for her to pick it up and play with it." — Janet D. [12] of Tulip and Thelma [13]

Placenta Teddy Bear

"Most bizarre parenting product/children’s toy [14]? Three words: Placenta Teddy Bear. Yes, that’s right, folks. A woman’s placenta . . . cured with sea salt, tanned into a pliable medium, cut into pieces following a pattern, and hand-stitched together into the world’s most horrifying teddy bear. The designer actually sells kits so you can do the same thing with your after-birth in the privacy of your own home." — Leslie M. [15] of The Bearded Iris [16]

Breastfeeding Doll

"Definitely the Breastfeeding Doll [17]. I wrote an entire post about it called 'Role Playing Toys.' Don’t get me wrong, I am all about some breastfeeding for all of those who can do it. I did it with all four of my kids. But this doll, with it’s little bra-like-thingy that gives your daughter (or son, I guess) fake nipples is a little extreme." — Ginger C. [18] of Counting Caballeros [19]

Baby Perfume

"I've always thought baby perfume was pretty odd [20]." — Amber D. [21]of Parenting With Crappy Pictures [22]

Birthing Doll

"The hand-stitched birthing doll [23] which, in my opinion, would create more questions than answers, is generally terrifying and retails for over $200." — Susan M. [24]of Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva [25]

Potty Training Doll

"Any doll that poops and pees [26] is on the top of this list. There's a lot of things I need more of, faux excrement isn't one of them." — Nicole L. [27] of Ninja Mom Blog [28]

"When I saw the commercial for the Baby Alive Whoopsie Doo doll, I thought I was watching Saturday Night Live [29]. Then I remembered that it was 7:30 in the morning. This is a doll that pees and poops. To me, that’s the sort of thing you’d distribute to teenagers in a high school health class as an exercise in birth control. Do little kids really want to change poopie diapers [30]? Mine sure won’t stay still when I’m changing hers." — Amy W. [31] of Carriage Before Marriage [32]

The Toddler Helmet

"The 'Toddler Helmet' — for crawling infants and toddlers to prevent injury while crawling [33] around the house. I think this is a solution for which there did not exist any problem." — Stacy and Kimberly [34] of Two Too Smart, Smartass Mommies [35]

"I think the worst product out there is the helmet [36] you can buy for your kid so he won't bang his head on anything when he's learning to crawl and/or walk. I didn't realize that so many children were permanently scarred or injured from bonking their heads on the floor when they're learning to walk." — Jen [37] of People I Want to Punch in the Throat  [38]

Time-Out Pad

"I'd have to say the Time Out Pad. It turns time out into a fun game [39]. Really? I think we've missed the point here people!" — Andrea C. [40] of The Underachiever's Guide to Being a Domestic Goddess [41]

Pee-Pee Teepee

"Pee Pee Teepee [42] — in a fitting wiener dog design, no less. Wow." — Gwen H. [43] of The Hartley Hooligans [44]

Zaky Infant Pillow

"Creepy [45] . . . looks like dismembered hands." — Gwen H. [46] of The Hartley Hooligans  [47] 


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