The 11 Stages of Getting Your Child to Wipe Himself (Successfully)

Potty-training success is huge in any parent's life, but a potty-trained child does not always mean that mama is off the hook for slinging poo. Sorry to break the news. Now that your tot has figured out where to go, you've got the task of teaching him how to clean himself after relieving himself. And believe me, this part of parenthood is no easy feat — and not one they mention in the parenting books. So whether you've been-there-done-that, or you're about to embark on this doody-ful milestone, check out a few of the stages most parents have to pass in order to get their child to successfully wipe themselves. Source: Shutterstock

01
You child is finally potty trained, but now the real question is . . .

You child is finally potty trained, but now the real question is . . .

Is he capable of wiping himself after going number two? Source: Giphy

02
He's pretty sure it's mommy's job.

He's pretty sure it's mommy's job.

Enter every mom's favorite phrase: "Mommy do it!!!" Source: CBS

03
But your husband tells you you're "babying" him.

But your husband tells you you're "babying" him.

"He should learn how to do it himself. Are you going to wipe his butt in college?" he asks. You decide he's right, and the next time your child is on the potty and he calls for your help, you tell him to try doing it himself. Source: HBO

04
Big mistake.

Big mistake.

Huge. Source: Giphy

05
So it's time for plan B.

So it's time for plan B.

Mommy will help with the wiping until he understands that, despite its deceptive name, the purpose of wiping is actually for cleaning — and not wiping poop all over the bathroom. Source: DreamWorks

06
You then teach him how to help make this partnership work.

You then teach him how to help make this partnership work.

Don't worry, we've all had our kids do this. Source: CBS

07
This works fine until the point comes when you're just done with wiping someone else's tush.

This works fine until the point comes when you're just done with wiping someone else's tush.

It's been months (maybe even years for some of you) — and the good news is that your kiddo is regular. The kid even goes in the middle of the night. The bad news is that wiping your child's tush gets old fast. Time for him to try doing it himself again. Source: MTV

08
So you decide to pass the baton (er, toilet paper) back to your child.

So you decide to pass the baton (er, toilet paper) back to your child.

"You can do it honey!" After all, he's seen how it's done for a while now. Surely he can figure this out. Source: Disney

09
Except then there's the "checking."

Except then there's the "checking."

And because of the amount of laundry you do, you happily oblige in the beginning. Even if it requires some assistance. Source: Bravo

10
And sometimes you might slack off on your doody detection duties.

And sometimes you might slack off on your doody detection duties.

After tush check number 101, your definition of wiping success has changed. "Looks great buddy. Good job." After all, you're basing this on a sliding scale and the fact that he's going to get a bath in about 30 minutes. Source: ABC

11
And then one glorious day he wipes himself clean as a whistle!

And then one glorious day he wipes himself clean as a whistle!

He shows you his tush and it's spotless. And he did not require your assistance. There is a God . . . Source: NBC