POPSUGAR

14 Reasons New Moms Need a Seasoned-Mom Friend

Mar 8 2014 - 5:56am

Seasoned moms and rookie moms have been known to butt heads — why can't we mamas just get along? Statements like, "Just wait until he's older," are not what a first-time mama needs to hear about her fit-throwing tot, we know! But instead of seeing them as your foe, newbies might want to think about befriending a mom who has a few years under her belt in the motherhood game. Sure, she may not always understand your new-mommy parenting style or why you have a birthing plan, but she has been there and might just be able to help you through it all . . . if you let her.

Source: Flickr user tudor [1]

You Can Ask Her the Weird Questions

New moms, especially pregnant ladies, have a lot of questions — and some of them may even be downright weird and embarrassing. Seasoned moms with a been there, done that spirit will happily answer questions like, "Did you poop the hospital bed during childbirth?" or "Why is my toddler always touching his private parts?"

Source: Flickr user greendoula [2]

She Gives Constructive Criticism

As much as we hate to admit it, new moms are sometimes at a loss for solving a baby problem. Turn to someone who's been there and she'll be able to help troubleshoot what you're not doing and even provide a little constructive criticism on what you're doing.

Source: Flickr user indyplanets [3]

She Was a New Mom Too

I know some seasoned mamas have the reputation for making new moms feel silly for worrying about some issues, but the truth is that she was once there too, and an empathetic mama will completely understand why you feel the way you do! She'll probably even reassure you with a seasoned mom's motto: this too shall pass.

Source: Flickr user liquene [4]

She's Not Competing With You

Rookie moms often face a lot of competition with other new moms, but a mother who is much more established in her mommy-hood is not in direct competition as you, and that's a good thing. She probably doesn't even carry a diaper bag, use a stroller, or have a preschool to pick, making her neutral across the board.

Source: Flickr user tetrapak [5]

She Knows That Hindsight is 20/20

Some of the best parenting ideas I've ever gotten have come from seasoned moms. Chances are she has some stellar tips and tricks as well as a few things she wishes she did differently, and you can learn from her past experiences.

Source: Flickr user yourdon [6]

She Was Pregnant Once Too

Moms who've been doing this mom thing for a while have one major thing in common with you, they were also pregnant at some point — and most of us also remember how much it sucked. Had some scares along the way? Chances are she also had some issues during pregnancy and can share her story to calm your nerves.

Source: Instagram user elisasofiacantu [7]

She Understands an Ultrasound

Speaking of pregnancy, guess who also knows how to look at an ultrasound (something new moms are over-the-moon excited to show off) and see the developing fetus in there? Or at least pretend like she does! No matter what, you probably won't hear phrases like, "Ew, gross," come out of her mouth.

Source: Flickr user mennovdhorst [8]

She Has Her Hobbies Back

Seasoned moms don't have tunnel vision, for their children anymore and they might even have time to do some of their own hobbies (gasp, I know). This can be a reassuring reminder to new moms with nothing but baby on the mind that they too will be back to the things they love (aside from baby, of course) in time.

Source: Flickr user chrishunkeler [9]

She's Not a Slave to a New Baby's Schedule

New moms often are slave to their babe's schedule during the first few months of life, making it hard to socialize with other new mamas. Friends whose babies and kids are older can swing by, keep you company, and even help out during such a trying time.

Source: Instagram user absolutelyjenny [10]

She's Got Hand-Me-Downs

Moms with growing children are almost always happy to pass along loved baby clothes — and they can explain to you why you should accept 'em too!

Source: Instagram user pearleneutley [11]

She Understands the Importance of Milestones

Need someone to brag about your babe's milestones to? Friends without kids don't get why it matters. Friends with babies the same age will compare their baby to yours. But friends with older kids can celebrate with you!

Source: Instagram user krystalmdonovan [12]

She Gets a Full Night's Sleep

One of my favorite things to ask a pro mommy is how well she sleeps at night. Usually it's fantastic nine nights out of 10 (older kids occasionally have their night issues too) — and I just use it as a reminder that I will sleep like a baby again (just maybe not as long as I've still got a young baby)!

Source: Flickr user photones [13]

She's Knows It's Not the End of the World

New moms tend to become consumed by events with their children (stomach bug, dropping a nap, preschool woes, etc.), and in the moment, we can't imagine not having to worry about the issue at hand. Seasoned moms provide the reminder that while it may seem like a big deal at the time, you will eventually move past it, and, heck, probably even forget about it.

Source: Instagram user reneerod82 [14]

She Still Loves Her Husband

Women and men are not cut from the same cloth, and there's no worse of a time for this fact to become blazingly obvious than when trying to raise a tiny human together. Many a seasoned mom has rekindled the romance with her man, even if he too was completely useless in the middle of the night when their kids were newborns — proving that once again, this too shall pass.

Source: Instagram user heather_mcdaniel [15]


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