7 Ways to Handle the Know-It-All Mom of the Group
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You think you have something to offer during a conversation among moms with your own parenting experience, when BAM!, the "Mom Who Knows It All" (hereby known as the MWKA) strikes. She's got the answer to every problem or her two cents to add in about everything, which she clearly feels is more valuable than what you have to say as she either discredits your input or talks right over you in the process.
It's easy to get angry at MWKA, but there's one important thing to remember before you get red in the face.
The MWKA is insecure. She has to say what she does is the "best way" because deep down inside she's either afraid she's completely messing up or because she wants people to value her and like her. By adding her opinion in â€" even if she discredits yours â€" she thinks this will make her seem valuable and well-liked. She's not trying (well, in many cases) to be rude to you even if she is; instead, she's trying to become or seem important.
Keeping this information in mind, here are seven tips for dealing with the MWKA.
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Point It Out
If the MWKA interrupts you, tell her she interrupted you and that you'd love to hear what she has to say once you're finished. Sure, you'd love to tell her she's being completely rude, but do you really want it to get ugly? No.
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Ignore It
Try to remember her need to be the "most knowledgeable mom" in town is stemming from her insecurity. If you really don't need to be heard or if she's just spewing her advice without being asked, let it slide. It's not worth it.
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Appreciate It
Tell her you appreciate the insights she has. We all need to feel appreciated sometimes. If she's coming out of left field and offending people or clearly being pushy, then . . .
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Watch It
Tell her she's overstepping her boundaries and/or offending people by pushing "what she knows." She will most likely lash out, but sometimes you need to be direct. Telling her to "watch it" now and then may be necessary.
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Avoid Her
If she's that annoying, avoid her unless you have deal with her for whatever reason.
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Tuck It Away
If the MWKA upsets you, tuck it away in the back of your head and simply prepare yourself for the next time you see her. She's not apt to change unless someone tells her that they're sick of hearing her profess to know it all! (And even then . . . )
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Empower Yourself
If you find she's a pain to deal with, gather a group of people who can successfully take her down a notch together, or who can make sure everyone's thoughts are heard. This way she won't bulldoze her way over everyone.
Remember, this mom who claims to have all the answers is most likely trying to help or feel validated in some way — not to be a jerk. When you think of it this way, it can help you cope with some of her unattractive behaviors.