Elementary

Most mothers think their children are crack-ups, but some things that come out of the mouths of babes are funny or offbeat enough to entertain the masses. I've compiled a few favorites that my own kids have said in the last month. Share your tot's utterances in the comments section!

• ‎"I don't want to have a naked head when I grow up." — 4-year-old son on balding.
• "We're playing dinosaur, chimpanzee, and yodeler." — 6-year-old daughter when I asked what she and her brothers were doing.
• ‎"I have to take a bath, fly a plane and eat a coconut to get rid of these hiccups!" — 4-year-old son.
• "This song makes my mouth dance!" — 4-year-old son when Pink's "Raise Your Glass" came on the car radio.
• "Did you know Santa is St. Nick? Kinda crazy how he never died, isn't it?" — 6-year-old daughter on why Santa is real.
• "I'm going to marry a guy who LOVES to clean!" — 6-year-old daughter on how to get rid of a big mess.
• "There's a little man inside me and when he giggles, I hiccup." — 4-year-old son.
• "He's going to be an actor. He looks just like Brad Pitt!" — 6-year-old daughter on her baby brother's future career.
• "I love using the word touche!" — 6-year-old daughter while reviewing her spelling words.
• "I don't want to break your heart, but I have to go to school now." — 4-year-old son getting out of the car.

Sydney popped the question at the park on last night's episode of Parenthood. Joel and Julia fumbled for an answer when the child inquired about her origins, asking if she "came from a vagina." The couple uncomfortably confirmed that they all came from vaginas, but their daughter's probe continued. Kids often initiate the birds and the bees conversation well before their parents anticipate it. To ensure that you aren't caught off guard when your youngster broaches the subject, here are a few tips for keeping the impromptu and G-rated conversation as low-key and comfortable as possible.

• Don't freak out. Your reaction sets the tone for future conversations.
• Ask your tot what she knows and where she got her information. Then go from there. There's no need to break out charts and graphs for a 3-year-old.
• Tell her an age-appropriate version of the truth.
• Don't scare your kids by getting overly serious. Relax!
• Encourage her to come to you in the future as she has further questions and/or thoughts.

Chime in with your own tips in the comments section!

Some kids draw on the walls, mine color their hair. My daughter and son think being blond is "too boring" and took changing things up into their own hands . . . and heads. Since we exhausted wigs and hair pieces and dye has been vetoed, my 6-year-old let a red marker bleed onto a carefully selected clump of her hair (Julia Roberts style), and a few days later my son drew a blue circle on his head. A $3 pack of washable markers made them happy until shampoo washed away their artistic expression.

Go ahead, write on the walls! Is chalkboard paint becoming passé? Maybe. Turn the walls of your kiddo's room into a wipe board with this inventive paint that allows for doodling with dry erase markers. The scribble space can come in handy for solving homework problems, relaying messages, and unleashing creativity. And, you don't have to clean up piles of loose paper!

Available in nine neutral shades — white, light gray, off white, light beige, gray, light green — and a poppy orange color, the CR8 water based IdeaPaint covers 50 square feet of space for $175. The HOME variety (also water based) comes only in white and sells for $30 (for 6 square feet of coverage) and $60 (for 20 square feet of coverage).

This post was submitted by jennibeans5 in The Mommy Club group.

My daughter's currently in a Catholic preschool.  We had planned to send her there for kindergarten in September, but now I just don't know.  They are in a very difficult financial situation and just told that teachers they will not be returning this fall.  The plan to keep the school open which is grades Pre-K to grade 8 and combine K through 2 and 3 through 5. They plan to do this with 1 teacher and an aide for K through 2. I'm very concerned that she (my daughter) will be left behind and not get the attention that she needs.  The principal is trying to assure parents that what they are trying to do is similar to the Montessori program.  (The) problem is Montessori teachers are specially trained and in our school they will be winging it. While I'd hate to see a school close, I feel like I should get out now and start fresh at a new school.  The problem is most public and private schools had their registration in February and March.  Am I crazy or does this plan for combining grades actually seem like it would be beneficial?

Talk about motherly things on your mind at The Mommy Club group over in the LilSugar Community.

Where do babies come from isn't a simple conversation anymore. It's not always about a mom and a dad or a man and a woman since conception happens everywhere — in bedrooms, in hospitals, and laboratories. In some situations there's a doctor, a donor, a surrogate, or even an attorney involved. The birds and the bees have become a bit more complicated, but the sex talk still happens, and children inquire earlier. Kids are sharp, if you give them the 1950s spiel about a man loving a woman, they'll likely have more questions.

How did their friend with two dads come to be — is it time to talk surrogacy? Or what about the classmate who was adopted by a single mother? Fertility treatments are mainstream, should parents dole out the basics of IVF (In vitro fertilization) and IUI (intra-uterine insemination)? As medical breakthroughs continue there's even the prospect of a three-parent conception method, so where should the conversation with our children end? What will (did) you tell your kids?

Kids love to stick their heads in cutouts at carnivals and county fairs, but Peaceable Kingdom Press has packaged the concept so you can gift it! The company's fun photo frame set ($5) comes with four stand-up sturdy board frames in body builder, hula girl, rockstar and princess varieties that have slip-in slots for the child's photo. The set also has 42 stickers to personalize the templates. If you're looking for an affordable present for children ages three to seven that will inspire endless creativity without breaking the bank, wrap this item up!