I may be on my second child, but I'm a novice nurser. Having had broken boobs with my first, I'm learning how to nurse to begin with, let alone while balancing it with the energy of my rambunctious 2-year-old. I wish I was one of those hippie moms who could effortlessly swing her nursing babe around while doing one-handed laundry and cook dinner at the same time like it was nothing. I'm not. Edith and I like to sit quietly on the couch with the Boppy pillow and focus.
So I think it goes without saying that, while I'm not afraid to nurse in public, it's a struggle for me to do it effortlessly. I fall somewhere in the middle when it comes to the modesty vs. "my right to nurse in public" argument. I'm not going to not nurse while I'm out and about; but I wouldn't say I'm comfortable whipping my boob out in the middle of the mall.
Using a light blanket or nursing cover has been working fine for us; but I've got to say, sometimes it's hard to get set up without looking while remaining covered. I mean, put a nursing cover over me and it's like I've forgotten how to unhook a bra. I'm sure it's not as complicated as I'm making it; but after sweating under a cover while trying to balance baby and get my boob out of my shirt one too many times, I decided to begin a quest for the best shirts for nursing.
It seems as soon as you become a mom, your relatives, friends, and even strangers start offering unsolicited suggestions on how to best raise your children.
"Every mom deals with loads of unwanted advice," Circle of Moms member Dorsha S. attests. And as Savannah J. shares, it's no fun to deal with: "The whole unwanted advice thing is the biggest negative about being pregnant — even over the vomiting, backaches, and charlie horses in the middle of the night."
Many moms, including Evelyn M., aren't sure how to respond. "How do you deal with it?" she asks the Circle of Moms community.
Similarly, mom Kate R. is wondering how to handle a know-it-all relative "who thinks they know more than you do about how to raise your own children." She adds: "I know I have to say something, but it is family and I don't want to hurt feelings as I know they mean well."
If you, too, are wondering how to handle unwanted parenting advice, consider the following tips offered by Circle of Moms members.
A trip to a restaurant can be fun family outing — not to mention a welcome break from making meals at home. But it's not always easy to get children to behave appropriately at restaurants. "My son will behave perfectly at McDonald's or any fast food restaurant because he knows he has to eat first before he can go play in the playroom, but when it comes to actual restaurants where you sit and order then wait for the food, he is a mess. I can't control him at all," admits Circle of Moms member Vanessa M. "My mother would have taken me to the bathroom and given me a good spanking. I honestly don't want to be that kind of parent," she adds.
For tips on teaching young children table manners and restaurant etiquette, Circle of Moms members offer the following seven tips.
No matter what your marital status, being a mother is hard. But Circle of Moms members like Nico R. maintain that single moms have it the toughest. She's not talking logistics, which some might think. She says it's the intrusive questions and the judgment she receives just because she doesn't have a spouse. Nico is often asked, "Why are you a single mom?" and it infuriates her. "I hate how people assume that since I am a single mom that I somehow managed to drive him away or I didn't even know who her father was." What is a single mom supposed to say to quiet the busybodies? Here, Nico and other single Circle of Moms members offer tips on how to respond with dignity.